Introduction—
What does it mean to have standards for your life?
Does everyone have standards?
Deep within your heart, would you rather have people in your life calling you to higher standards or would you rather have people who do not challenge you?
Would you rather have spiritual leaders around you that are trying really hard to not offend people or would you rather have them strive to love like Christ, and zealously have holy expectations for you?
- Keep in mind as I get into the lesson that I want to challenge the thinking of the group tonight—not telling you how to think but challenging you to think from God's word in practical areas of your life.
- I believe you've seen our hearts for you—I can at least look the brothers in the eye and attest that we've come along way, and I believe you see that I love your souls.
- So, you'll know I'm not speaking out of rules and regulations, but out of zeal that you would all be a holy people of God!
- Please don't hold back saying "Amen" because it means "Yes, I agree!"
Read Numbers 25
§ Explain and expound a little from the passage:
o The leaders were weak in their convictions and it led the people astray!
o God had them put to death people that they had grown up around, many family members!
o The actions of one man turned away the wrath of God!
o Why? Because Phinehas had the same zeal that God has for His honor!
o The passage even mentions the people by name!
§ I believe there is a whole slew of areas where we can zealously repent and have higher expectations: prayer, worship, serving, loving one another, giving sacrificially (time and money—even fundraisers to advance the gospel), evangelism!
§ However, since the topic ties really well into what is going on in this passage, let's look at…
- Have holy standards in the way you date
- What does holiness mean? Literally "to be set apart." Also similar, the church literally means "the called out."
- You are called to be radically different from the world (1John 2:15-17)!
- Share a few points about your dating relationshi
- 1Corinthians 7:39
i. A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.
ii. If he must belong to the Lord on remarriage, just as much if someone is married.
- 2Corinthians 6:14—7:1 (Read 7:1)
i. 14Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 15What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? 16What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people."
17"Therefore come out from them
and be separate, says the Lord.
Touch no unclean thing,
and I will receive you."
18"I will be a Father to you,
and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."
1 Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.
ii. Do not be yoked—the contractual agreement of marriage is definitely a yoke.
iii. We can take both verses together and see very clearly that God does not want us to marry an unbeliever.
iv. Valid question for all single disciples: Why would you date someone you wouldn't marry?
v. On both sides of the coin: It seems unfair to have these sorts of hidden values. And it is also unfair to express them to someone as a condition.
1. Why would you start down the path of developing an intimate relationship with someone who does not have the Spirit of God? Why would you put yourself in a situation where you could very likely weaken and lose your convictions all together?
vi. <Read 7:1 here>
1. Again, I'm not speaking out of rules and regulations.
2. You're free in Christ; I'm simply a brother challenging you to think spiritually, from God's word.
3. I'm speaking out of an expectation of holiness!
4. You can do a study (I'll even give you the verses) that
- Luke 14:25-27
i. 25 Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: 26 "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. 27 And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.
ii. You know this verse from the discipleship study.
iii. The heart of a disciple puts God far exceedingly first—no other relationships should contend with God—no other relationship should make you waver in your commitment!
iv. If it makes you waver—holds you back from making Jesus Lord—cut it off!!!
v. "You're too radical!" Do you not hear the words of God? I'm convinced we'd be saying that to Jesus!
- Read: Ephesians 5:3-7
i. 3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. 4 Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. 5 For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a man is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. 6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God's wrath comes on those who are disobedient. 7 Therefore do not be partners with them.
1. From what the bible says here, how much sexual sin is tolerable?
2. Not even a hint—what does that mean to you?
3. Sure you've seen God convert people when someone made the choice to date outside the faith…but you might not have all the perspective.
4. Be warned that sexual sin is exponentially more likely in relationships when you're dating someone who is not a disciple—there is less of an influence to stay pure.
§ For all these reasons (and more) we chose to not give our support to someone making the decision to date a nonChristian—not to say we won't pray for you and have fellowship, but that we simply urge against it.
§ I mainly hope to get you to read God's word and develop deep convictions for how you go about your life.
§ I hope and pray you know my heart…
o I say this out of love for God—we wouldn't be honoring Him if we didn't have higher expectations for all of you.
o I say this out o love for anyone making this decision—guarding your souls from the evil one's schemes!
o I say this out of love for the group as a whole—that we're the salt of the earth, a place of sanctification!
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